WEEK 6 YESOD
Day 41, Yesod within Yesod
Yesod (foundation, connection)
Thursday, June 30, 2011
Wednesday, June 29, 2011
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
Monday, June 27, 2011
Sunday, June 26, 2011
WEEK 6 YESOD
Day 37, Gevurah within Yesod
Gevurah (strength, judgement, justice, boundaries, restraint)
Yesod (foundation, connection)
Sitting here within the 37th Gate, I'm wondering how this day will unfold. There's an urge within me to get my website back up -- it's been down (disconnected) for probably a week now. My website has been sort of like a foundation for my business for 15 years or more, and, for some reason, I've been able to be in the space of letting it be down.
Here's something interesting . . . my websites went down during the week of Hod -- the last 5 days of Hod. And during that time, I did NOT do this practice, Counting the Omer. It was not in my consciousness to do the practice. I totally forgot about doing it for 5 days. It reminds me a little of being in exile in the desert like the Israelites . . . and this Omer practice is about that.
Day 37, Gevurah within Yesod
Gevurah (strength, judgement, justice, boundaries, restraint)
Yesod (foundation, connection)
Sitting here within the 37th Gate, I'm wondering how this day will unfold. There's an urge within me to get my website back up -- it's been down (disconnected) for probably a week now. My website has been sort of like a foundation for my business for 15 years or more, and, for some reason, I've been able to be in the space of letting it be down.
Here's something interesting . . . my websites went down during the week of Hod -- the last 5 days of Hod. And during that time, I did NOT do this practice, Counting the Omer. It was not in my consciousness to do the practice. I totally forgot about doing it for 5 days. It reminds me a little of being in exile in the desert like the Israelites . . . and this Omer practice is about that.
Saturday, June 25, 2011
WEEK 6 YESOD
Day 36, Hesed within Yesod
Hesed (lovingkindness, ever-flow, no boundaries, no restraint, unconditional giving)
Yesod (foundation, connection)
Entering this 36th Gate of Consciousness, the beginning of my week-long exploration within Yesod I've connected with two very close friends from my past. BB lives in Montana now; we knew each other when we both lived in Northern Virginia. She was my first Kabbalistic Healer and my Kabbalah teacher. She is now the Director of the healing school that I went to for four years. MB lives in Florida; we knew each other while we were both attending the healing school just mentioned. Oddly, we did not get close to each other until after we left the school.
In our conversation, BB mentioned that she was needing to let go of a huge number of clients because the school was taking up so much of her time. We discussed the potential of my taking on a good number of those clients. If this increase in number of clients manifest for me, I may very well have the monetary resources necessary for me to participate in the DH Teacher Training/Seminary Program. I see the Hesed within Yesod throughout this whole phone conversation!
MB and I talked for more than an hour catching up. We used to connect by phone every few months but haven't talked for probably a year. She's been going through a LOT of change in her life that somehow precluded our phone contacts. And, for some reason, her email account would not "get through" to my Comcast email account. There was a block or something between the two email accounts. I also see the Hesed within Yesod throughout this phone conversation as well.
One more thing that I noticed in both phone conversations (connections) was how there had been "disconnects." And, another thing I noticed is how Foundations for both my friends, as well as myself, have been being shifted.
Day 36, Hesed within Yesod
Hesed (lovingkindness, ever-flow, no boundaries, no restraint, unconditional giving)
Yesod (foundation, connection)
Entering this 36th Gate of Consciousness, the beginning of my week-long exploration within Yesod I've connected with two very close friends from my past. BB lives in Montana now; we knew each other when we both lived in Northern Virginia. She was my first Kabbalistic Healer and my Kabbalah teacher. She is now the Director of the healing school that I went to for four years. MB lives in Florida; we knew each other while we were both attending the healing school just mentioned. Oddly, we did not get close to each other until after we left the school.
In our conversation, BB mentioned that she was needing to let go of a huge number of clients because the school was taking up so much of her time. We discussed the potential of my taking on a good number of those clients. If this increase in number of clients manifest for me, I may very well have the monetary resources necessary for me to participate in the DH Teacher Training/Seminary Program. I see the Hesed within Yesod throughout this whole phone conversation!
MB and I talked for more than an hour catching up. We used to connect by phone every few months but haven't talked for probably a year. She's been going through a LOT of change in her life that somehow precluded our phone contacts. And, for some reason, her email account would not "get through" to my Comcast email account. There was a block or something between the two email accounts. I also see the Hesed within Yesod throughout this phone conversation as well.
One more thing that I noticed in both phone conversations (connections) was how there had been "disconnects." And, another thing I noticed is how Foundations for both my friends, as well as myself, have been being shifted.
Friday, June 24, 2011
WEEK 5 HOD
Day 35, Malkhut within Hod
Malkhut (kingdom, the reflection of everything) Malkhut represents the power that ultimately unifies all the diverse powers of the Sefirot and holds everything together. Without Malkhut, creation would remain incomplete.
Hod (splendor, empathy, thankfulness, gratefulness, submission, surrender, joy)
Day 35, Malkhut within Hod
Malkhut (kingdom, the reflection of everything) Malkhut represents the power that ultimately unifies all the diverse powers of the Sefirot and holds everything together. Without Malkhut, creation would remain incomplete.
Hod (splendor, empathy, thankfulness, gratefulness, submission, surrender, joy)
Thursday, June 23, 2011
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
Monday, June 20, 2011
Sunday, June 19, 2011
WEEK 5 HOD
Day 30, Gevurah within Hod
Gevurah (strength, judgement, justice, boundaries, restraint)
Hod (splendor, empathy, thankfulness, gratefulness, submission, surrender, joy)
Dropping into the 30th Gate of Consciousness, into the splendor of my True Nature. Here's where my true strength lies. I've experienced a number of periods today where I'm truly grateful for being who I am . . . and even not knowing fully who I am. Yes, it sounds like a paradox and it is that. The important thing for me now is to pay attention to whom I'm taking myself to be . . . so that I can see each identity and the ideas and beliefs each identity holds fixed in my mind. These fixed ideas and beliefs are what makes my Gevurah out-of-balance . . . too much rigidity. So, when I can remember to just let go . . . be exactly where I am without judgement (criticism) . . . just acceptance . . . then my experience will unfold to reveal more of what's real -- LIFE.
Day 30, Gevurah within Hod
Gevurah (strength, judgement, justice, boundaries, restraint)
Hod (splendor, empathy, thankfulness, gratefulness, submission, surrender, joy)
Dropping into the 30th Gate of Consciousness, into the splendor of my True Nature. Here's where my true strength lies. I've experienced a number of periods today where I'm truly grateful for being who I am . . . and even not knowing fully who I am. Yes, it sounds like a paradox and it is that. The important thing for me now is to pay attention to whom I'm taking myself to be . . . so that I can see each identity and the ideas and beliefs each identity holds fixed in my mind. These fixed ideas and beliefs are what makes my Gevurah out-of-balance . . . too much rigidity. So, when I can remember to just let go . . . be exactly where I am without judgement (criticism) . . . just acceptance . . . then my experience will unfold to reveal more of what's real -- LIFE.
Saturday, June 18, 2011
WEEK 5 HOD
Day 29, Hesed within Hod
Hesed (lovingkindness, ever-flow, no boundaries, no restraint, unconditional giving)
Hod (splendor, empathy, thankfulness, gratefulness, submission, surrender, joy)
Early this morning, as I entered the 29th Gate of Consciousness, I opened to exploring more about where I am in relation to completing an application for the new Ridhwan Teacher Training. It was like walking through a long corridor looking into rooms that held thoughts, feelings, ideas and beliefs that I was already familiar with. Suddenly I came to this place (or space) where it was very clear that I was doing exactly what I needed to be doing now and that I didn't need to become anything other than what I am. I realized at that moment -- visual snapshots moved through my mind at something like warp-speed -- that I've spent my whole life "becoming" but there was something about the "way" I went about it that seemed to be trying to fill a hole. So the realization was that I don't need to do anything toward becoming anything . . . that I'm already whole.
I'm still not clear as to whether I'm going to apply for this teacher training, but I am clear that if I do it, it will be from a totally different place than where I was -- free of identifications or need to be identified.
Let me take a moment to acknowledge that my early morning Inquiry was clearly supported within Hod. I felt such gratefulness and acceptance (a submission to what is); and I felt a more solid, clear sense of self. The experience also included such lovingkindness toward myself! No judgement (no super ego anywhere in my space).
Day 29, Hesed within Hod
Hesed (lovingkindness, ever-flow, no boundaries, no restraint, unconditional giving)
Hod (splendor, empathy, thankfulness, gratefulness, submission, surrender, joy)
Early this morning, as I entered the 29th Gate of Consciousness, I opened to exploring more about where I am in relation to completing an application for the new Ridhwan Teacher Training. It was like walking through a long corridor looking into rooms that held thoughts, feelings, ideas and beliefs that I was already familiar with. Suddenly I came to this place (or space) where it was very clear that I was doing exactly what I needed to be doing now and that I didn't need to become anything other than what I am. I realized at that moment -- visual snapshots moved through my mind at something like warp-speed -- that I've spent my whole life "becoming" but there was something about the "way" I went about it that seemed to be trying to fill a hole. So the realization was that I don't need to do anything toward becoming anything . . . that I'm already whole.
I'm still not clear as to whether I'm going to apply for this teacher training, but I am clear that if I do it, it will be from a totally different place than where I was -- free of identifications or need to be identified.
Let me take a moment to acknowledge that my early morning Inquiry was clearly supported within Hod. I felt such gratefulness and acceptance (a submission to what is); and I felt a more solid, clear sense of self. The experience also included such lovingkindness toward myself! No judgement (no super ego anywhere in my space).
Friday, June 17, 2011
WEEK 4 NETZACH
Day 28, Malkhut within Netzach
Malkhut (kingdom, the reflection of everything) Malkhut represents the power that ultimately unifies all the diverse powers of the Sefirot and holds everything together. Without Malkhut, creation would remain incomplete.
Netzach (victory, conquering, eternity, security, dominance -- also, determination, perserverence)
Entering this 28th Gate I wonder what the day will reveal. By 7:45 a.m., my work with my own teacher ignited a spark . . . a very deep understanding about myself and my work in the world. Integrating this revelation is continuing and will take some time, I think, before I'm even capable to expressing how this affects me. I will say that our work together this morning reiterates a truth I've knows a long time, and one that I try to teach others as well -- God's will and my will are not as separate as we usually think. Said another way -- God's victory and my (true) victory are the same.
Day 28, Malkhut within Netzach
Malkhut (kingdom, the reflection of everything) Malkhut represents the power that ultimately unifies all the diverse powers of the Sefirot and holds everything together. Without Malkhut, creation would remain incomplete.
Netzach (victory, conquering, eternity, security, dominance -- also, determination, perserverence)
Entering this 28th Gate I wonder what the day will reveal. By 7:45 a.m., my work with my own teacher ignited a spark . . . a very deep understanding about myself and my work in the world. Integrating this revelation is continuing and will take some time, I think, before I'm even capable to expressing how this affects me. I will say that our work together this morning reiterates a truth I've knows a long time, and one that I try to teach others as well -- God's will and my will are not as separate as we usually think. Said another way -- God's victory and my (true) victory are the same.
Thursday, June 16, 2011
WEEK 4 NETZACH
Day 27, Yesod within Netzach
Yesod (foundation, connection)
Netzach (victory, conquering, eternity, security, dominance -- also, determination, perserverence)
Through a profoundly deep inquiry I realized that my wanting to become a DH teacher had previously been tied-up with wanting the identity -- to become that. Today I realized that I do NOT want another identity. I'm tired of identities -- structures that control my life unconsciously.
Now . . . do I still want to do the work to be a DH teacher? Do I want to expend the required energy and resources (time, money, effort, relationship-strains) for the next ten years (at least)? My birthday was yesterday -- ten years from now I'd be 70 years old. They are specifically looking for 30-40 year old people. I obviously do not meet that piece of criteria.
Day 27, Yesod within Netzach
Yesod (foundation, connection)
Netzach (victory, conquering, eternity, security, dominance -- also, determination, perserverence)
Through a profoundly deep inquiry I realized that my wanting to become a DH teacher had previously been tied-up with wanting the identity -- to become that. Today I realized that I do NOT want another identity. I'm tired of identities -- structures that control my life unconsciously.
Now . . . do I still want to do the work to be a DH teacher? Do I want to expend the required energy and resources (time, money, effort, relationship-strains) for the next ten years (at least)? My birthday was yesterday -- ten years from now I'd be 70 years old. They are specifically looking for 30-40 year old people. I obviously do not meet that piece of criteria.
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
WEEK 4 NETZACH
Day 26, Hod within Netzach
Hod (splendor, empathy, thankfulness, gratefulness, submission, surrender, joy)
Netzach (victory, conquering, eternity, security, dominance -- also, determination, perserverence)
Gate 26 feels like a perfect place to be on my birthday! I think this is an area on the tree where I'm doing a lot of practice and healing. The Hod-side usually feels more comfortable than the Netzach-side. But what would it be like -- what will it be like to let myself drop into Netzach first and then open up to experiencing Hod from THAT place. Let's see how it unfolds today.
I was notified of a potential opportunity to to go to the Ridhwan Seminary and become a Diamond Heart teacher. This is something I've been longing to do for some number of years. There are so many obstacles showing up around actually getting this to manifest. Time to sit with all this and just let it be here -- the opportunity, the obstacles, and my feelings around all of this.
Day 26, Hod within Netzach
Hod (splendor, empathy, thankfulness, gratefulness, submission, surrender, joy)
Netzach (victory, conquering, eternity, security, dominance -- also, determination, perserverence)
Gate 26 feels like a perfect place to be on my birthday! I think this is an area on the tree where I'm doing a lot of practice and healing. The Hod-side usually feels more comfortable than the Netzach-side. But what would it be like -- what will it be like to let myself drop into Netzach first and then open up to experiencing Hod from THAT place. Let's see how it unfolds today.
I was notified of a potential opportunity to to go to the Ridhwan Seminary and become a Diamond Heart teacher. This is something I've been longing to do for some number of years. There are so many obstacles showing up around actually getting this to manifest. Time to sit with all this and just let it be here -- the opportunity, the obstacles, and my feelings around all of this.
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
WEEK 4 NETZACH
Day 25, Netzach within Netzach
Netzach (victory, conquering, eternity, security, dominance -- also, determination, perserverence)
It was interesting to realize that I totally forgot to journal on this day about this 25th Gate. I'd had an unusually full day beginning with an 8 a.m. appointment then getting on the road to meet with the Federal Way Inner-critic Book Study Group. I had a lovely lunch with one of the ladies in the group. I realized much later that our lunchtime conversation had a LOT of Netzach-related threads.
There were a good number of stops that I had to make on the way home -- things I needed to do before a 5 p.m. appointment. I arrived home with 30 minutes to spare -- which felt like quite a victory (considering how tired I was).
Day 25, Netzach within Netzach
Netzach (victory, conquering, eternity, security, dominance -- also, determination, perserverence)
It was interesting to realize that I totally forgot to journal on this day about this 25th Gate. I'd had an unusually full day beginning with an 8 a.m. appointment then getting on the road to meet with the Federal Way Inner-critic Book Study Group. I had a lovely lunch with one of the ladies in the group. I realized much later that our lunchtime conversation had a LOT of Netzach-related threads.
There were a good number of stops that I had to make on the way home -- things I needed to do before a 5 p.m. appointment. I arrived home with 30 minutes to spare -- which felt like quite a victory (considering how tired I was).
Monday, June 13, 2011
WEEK 4 NETZACH
Day 24, Tiferet within Netzach
Tiferet (beauty, mercy, compassion, the harmonization of Gevurah & Hesed)
Netzach (victory, conquering, eternity, security, dominance -- also, determination, perseverance)
What a great day for this 24th Gate of Consciousness! Potential victory within reach, I think because I surrendered. Interesting thought, eh? I just made a long overdue doctor appointment for something I've been battling over three weeks now. Every time I thought I had the issue (probably a bacteria infection) taken care of, it would re-surface. I see how my strength in perseverance can easily swing the other way and become a weakness, i.e., bull headededness.
I have an extremely hard inner-judge (strong super ego) when it comes to my own medical issues. The judgement is around the idea that whatever it is "it's my fault." So, I know it's not necessarily true, but there's a part of me that believes it hook-line-and-sinker. I see the strong-armed super ego as nega-Gevurah (a negative Gevurah, one with very little healthy Hesed balancing it). From this Kabbalistic perspective, disengaging from the super ego allows Hesed (expansion, lovingkindness) to be present and balance the strong, rigid Gevurah.
Day 24, Tiferet within Netzach
Tiferet (beauty, mercy, compassion, the harmonization of Gevurah & Hesed)
Netzach (victory, conquering, eternity, security, dominance -- also, determination, perseverance)
What a great day for this 24th Gate of Consciousness! Potential victory within reach, I think because I surrendered. Interesting thought, eh? I just made a long overdue doctor appointment for something I've been battling over three weeks now. Every time I thought I had the issue (probably a bacteria infection) taken care of, it would re-surface. I see how my strength in perseverance can easily swing the other way and become a weakness, i.e., bull headededness.
I have an extremely hard inner-judge (strong super ego) when it comes to my own medical issues. The judgement is around the idea that whatever it is "it's my fault." So, I know it's not necessarily true, but there's a part of me that believes it hook-line-and-sinker. I see the strong-armed super ego as nega-Gevurah (a negative Gevurah, one with very little healthy Hesed balancing it). From this Kabbalistic perspective, disengaging from the super ego allows Hesed (expansion, lovingkindness) to be present and balance the strong, rigid Gevurah.
Sunday, June 12, 2011
WEEK 4 NETZACH
Day 23, Gevurah within Netzach
Gevurah (strength, judgement, justice, boundaries, restraint)
Netzach (victory, conquering, eternity, security, dominance -- also, determination, perserverence)
Today's experience within Gate 23 will include being with a small group of people who are interested in learning more about Raindrop Technique -- using Young Living essential oils. We're having a free demo at my home/office from 10-12 noon.
This is the second time I've offered this demo; and, I do it specifically so that people can see how easy it is to incorporate it into their lives as something they can do for themselves for their health and well-being. My friend, Lynne, is doing the demo this time -- she's a massage therapist, and has begun offering it as a service within her own massage practice.
Community-building is another motivation, a motivation that seems to be consistently present -- a community of like-minded, curious, open-hearted people. What would it be like to be a part of a group who use these essential oils, who continue to explore how to use them, and share that information with each other as well as others who don't know about them!?
The visual image that's arising in my mind-field (having to do with Netzach) is a little sprout pushing up through the earth . . . a perseverance to grow, a determination to live to its fullest potential.
Day 23, Gevurah within Netzach
Gevurah (strength, judgement, justice, boundaries, restraint)
Netzach (victory, conquering, eternity, security, dominance -- also, determination, perserverence)
Today's experience within Gate 23 will include being with a small group of people who are interested in learning more about Raindrop Technique -- using Young Living essential oils. We're having a free demo at my home/office from 10-12 noon.
This is the second time I've offered this demo; and, I do it specifically so that people can see how easy it is to incorporate it into their lives as something they can do for themselves for their health and well-being. My friend, Lynne, is doing the demo this time -- she's a massage therapist, and has begun offering it as a service within her own massage practice.
Community-building is another motivation, a motivation that seems to be consistently present -- a community of like-minded, curious, open-hearted people. What would it be like to be a part of a group who use these essential oils, who continue to explore how to use them, and share that information with each other as well as others who don't know about them!?
The visual image that's arising in my mind-field (having to do with Netzach) is a little sprout pushing up through the earth . . . a perseverance to grow, a determination to live to its fullest potential.
Saturday, June 11, 2011
WEEK 4 NETZACH
Day 22, Hesed within Netzach
Hesed (lovingkindness, ever-flow, no boundaries, no restraint, unconditional giving)
Netzach (victory, conquering, eternity, security, dominance -- also, determination, perserverence)
Walking into this Gate 22, two thoughts arise: first, that I need more practice in understanding this gate (so today may well bring the practice that I need); and secondly, my favorite number is 22 (well, it was the thought that arise).
We're leaving in an hour to drive to Bellingham to a memorial service for Dave's uncle. I did not know Harold long, or well, but he seemed like a class-act human being. I don't know that I ever heard him say a negative thing about anybody . . . and if he did, you didn't quite realize it was negative. Anyway, we'll be in the car driving for three hours along with Elsie, Dave's aunt. She's the last surviving sister of that generation of siblings.
Day 22, Hesed within Netzach
Hesed (lovingkindness, ever-flow, no boundaries, no restraint, unconditional giving)
Netzach (victory, conquering, eternity, security, dominance -- also, determination, perserverence)
Walking into this Gate 22, two thoughts arise: first, that I need more practice in understanding this gate (so today may well bring the practice that I need); and secondly, my favorite number is 22 (well, it was the thought that arise).
We're leaving in an hour to drive to Bellingham to a memorial service for Dave's uncle. I did not know Harold long, or well, but he seemed like a class-act human being. I don't know that I ever heard him say a negative thing about anybody . . . and if he did, you didn't quite realize it was negative. Anyway, we'll be in the car driving for three hours along with Elsie, Dave's aunt. She's the last surviving sister of that generation of siblings.
Friday, June 10, 2011
WEEK 3 TIFERET
Day 21, Malkhut within Tiferet
Malkhut (kingdom, the reflection of everything) Malkhut represents the power that ultimately unifies all the diverse powers of the Sefirot and holds everything together. Without Malkhut, creation would remain incomplete.
Tiferet (beauty, mercy, compassion, the harmonization of Gevurah & Hesed)
Today, this 21st Gate of Consciousness feels like Glory reflecting Glory -- somehow heaven reflecting earth, the mundane reflecting the spiritual realm. I had a couple of opportunities to see great strength and beauty in what was considered vulnerabilities and weaknesses. And, I continue to get chances to practice seeing how we (I) think through such distorted lenses.
Here's a great quote from my favorite teacher Hameed Ali aka A. H. Almaas: So understanding doesn't create or add antything; in fact, it removes what is there to start with. (quote from p. 229, Spacecruiser Inquiry). He goes on to explain why it is that we often feel like we're grieving a loss when we see through a belief, idea, identification, etc.
Later this afternoon I was given a precious gift -- a chance to work with Dr. Rebecca Coleman,
O C E A N Embodiment Education Enterprises, Inc. I've been considering doing the HcG diet again in the near future. I liked the way I was able to work with my whole being while working with that particular diet. Specifically, the fact that the HcG serum communicates with the hypothalamus to assure it that I'm NOT starving is comforting to me. Dr. Coleman's work also includes levels of the body -- organs and systems of the physical body as well as the emotional psychological bodies. I believe working together with Dr. Coleman will add to my healing process around nourishment and self/body image.
Glory reflecting Glory . . . Sefirot within Sefirot . . . Trees within Tress . . . Holographic Universes.
Day 21, Malkhut within Tiferet
Malkhut (kingdom, the reflection of everything) Malkhut represents the power that ultimately unifies all the diverse powers of the Sefirot and holds everything together. Without Malkhut, creation would remain incomplete.
Tiferet (beauty, mercy, compassion, the harmonization of Gevurah & Hesed)
Today, this 21st Gate of Consciousness feels like Glory reflecting Glory -- somehow heaven reflecting earth, the mundane reflecting the spiritual realm. I had a couple of opportunities to see great strength and beauty in what was considered vulnerabilities and weaknesses. And, I continue to get chances to practice seeing how we (I) think through such distorted lenses.
Here's a great quote from my favorite teacher Hameed Ali aka A. H. Almaas: So understanding doesn't create or add antything; in fact, it removes what is there to start with. (quote from p. 229, Spacecruiser Inquiry). He goes on to explain why it is that we often feel like we're grieving a loss when we see through a belief, idea, identification, etc.
Later this afternoon I was given a precious gift -- a chance to work with Dr. Rebecca Coleman,
O C E A N Embodiment Education Enterprises, Inc. I've been considering doing the HcG diet again in the near future. I liked the way I was able to work with my whole being while working with that particular diet. Specifically, the fact that the HcG serum communicates with the hypothalamus to assure it that I'm NOT starving is comforting to me. Dr. Coleman's work also includes levels of the body -- organs and systems of the physical body as well as the emotional psychological bodies. I believe working together with Dr. Coleman will add to my healing process around nourishment and self/body image.
Glory reflecting Glory . . . Sefirot within Sefirot . . . Trees within Tress . . . Holographic Universes.
Thursday, June 09, 2011
WEEK 3 TIFERET
Day 20, Yesod within Tiferet
Yesod (foundation, connection)
Tiferet (beauty, mercy, compassion, the harmonization of Gevurah & Hesed)
This 20th gate of consciousness feels like another easy-to-be place for me. I feel totally connected to all of my surrounding -- the beauty of nature that surrounds me in this setting, this place where I live. This morning I feel very embodied, present, firmly seated with all of me here now.
What better way to enjoy this Gate . . . I left early this morning, after sitting, for a Raindrop Technique and massage. Lynne uses therapeutic-grade essential oils -- seven single oils and then two or three blends. This particular technique touches every organ, every system in my physical body; AND, it also works in the subtle energy fields. She began with my feet, working the various oils into each foot and focusing on my spine-area of the foot. And, then she dropped the oils like rain (dropping through my auric field) up and down my spine. It felt so refreshing and relaxing. I felt energized and yet calm. This was a beautiful gift to myself. And, I see doing things like this for myself as a way to maintain a healthy foundation for my body-mind-soul.
On my way home, I stopped and connected with a friend who's returned to working someplace she used to work . . . left and returned. She's surrounded herself with beauty -- natural beauty, i.e., plants, trees, running water, ponds, fresh aroma and peacefulness.
In late afternoon, my grandson called . . . well, he's 14 months old and his mom said he wanted to call me. I don't know how he told her that he wanted to call me . . . it didn't matter how. I loved hearing his little voice making his 14 month old sounds. He loves talking on the phone . . . and when he's done, he folds up the phone and hangs up. All done! ha, ha, ha
Day 20, Yesod within Tiferet
Yesod (foundation, connection)
Tiferet (beauty, mercy, compassion, the harmonization of Gevurah & Hesed)
This 20th gate of consciousness feels like another easy-to-be place for me. I feel totally connected to all of my surrounding -- the beauty of nature that surrounds me in this setting, this place where I live. This morning I feel very embodied, present, firmly seated with all of me here now.
What better way to enjoy this Gate . . . I left early this morning, after sitting, for a Raindrop Technique and massage. Lynne uses therapeutic-grade essential oils -- seven single oils and then two or three blends. This particular technique touches every organ, every system in my physical body; AND, it also works in the subtle energy fields. She began with my feet, working the various oils into each foot and focusing on my spine-area of the foot. And, then she dropped the oils like rain (dropping through my auric field) up and down my spine. It felt so refreshing and relaxing. I felt energized and yet calm. This was a beautiful gift to myself. And, I see doing things like this for myself as a way to maintain a healthy foundation for my body-mind-soul.
On my way home, I stopped and connected with a friend who's returned to working someplace she used to work . . . left and returned. She's surrounded herself with beauty -- natural beauty, i.e., plants, trees, running water, ponds, fresh aroma and peacefulness.
In late afternoon, my grandson called . . . well, he's 14 months old and his mom said he wanted to call me. I don't know how he told her that he wanted to call me . . . it didn't matter how. I loved hearing his little voice making his 14 month old sounds. He loves talking on the phone . . . and when he's done, he folds up the phone and hangs up. All done! ha, ha, ha
Wednesday, June 08, 2011
WEEK 3 TIFERET
Day 19, Hod within Tiferet
Hod (splendor, empathy, thankfulness, gratefulness, submission, surrender, joy)
Tiferet (beauty, mercy, compassion, the harmonization of Gevurah & Hesed)
Well, I must admit I have some expectation to this 19th gate . . . because I feel such an affinity to both Tiferet AND Hod. That said, I'm open to experience whatever the Universe sets in my path this day, whatever I need to help me deepen into understanding myself, others, and the world (both within and around me).
I guess it was mid-morning when I began to recognize that I had some residual feelings and emotions having to do with some judgements. I guess I'd been holding back some super ego ranting and finally she (SE) let go. The judgement was around people in "service" jobs NOT being of service . . . in fact, not even acting as if they care. It's interesting how a moment experienced at any time is connected to multiple threads within a pattern within your life. I took the time needed to explore this pattern along with the emotions that arose as a result of giving it attention. The bottom-line discovery here has to do with "capacity." I don't like it and I don't like admitting it but there are people who do NOT have the capacity to truly care about another human being -- sentient being -- unless there's something in it for them. That makes me so sad to even write it.
Day 19, Hod within Tiferet
Hod (splendor, empathy, thankfulness, gratefulness, submission, surrender, joy)
Tiferet (beauty, mercy, compassion, the harmonization of Gevurah & Hesed)
Well, I must admit I have some expectation to this 19th gate . . . because I feel such an affinity to both Tiferet AND Hod. That said, I'm open to experience whatever the Universe sets in my path this day, whatever I need to help me deepen into understanding myself, others, and the world (both within and around me).
I guess it was mid-morning when I began to recognize that I had some residual feelings and emotions having to do with some judgements. I guess I'd been holding back some super ego ranting and finally she (SE) let go. The judgement was around people in "service" jobs NOT being of service . . . in fact, not even acting as if they care. It's interesting how a moment experienced at any time is connected to multiple threads within a pattern within your life. I took the time needed to explore this pattern along with the emotions that arose as a result of giving it attention. The bottom-line discovery here has to do with "capacity." I don't like it and I don't like admitting it but there are people who do NOT have the capacity to truly care about another human being -- sentient being -- unless there's something in it for them. That makes me so sad to even write it.
Tuesday, June 07, 2011
WEEK 3 TIFERET
Day 18, Netzach within Tiferet
Netzach (victory, conquering, eternity, security, dominance -- also, determination, perserverence)
Tiferet (beauty, mercy, compassion, the harmonization of Gevurah & Hesed)
This morning I did an Inquiry about "Mercy" with a friend from my Diamond Heart group. We started out inquiring about Mercy, remembering some phrases -- particularly the one: "Lord have Mercy." My grandmother used that one. She wasn't particularly religious; so, it seemed that the phrase was just something folks said in the south at certain times.
As the inquiry continued, the field informed us of a sense of helplessness . . . as if the one who's asking for mercy feels helpless. There was also a sense that some authority was the one who would grant the mercy -- like a sovereign or a judge or a god. Moving deeper into understanding mercy, it became obvious that one typically "asked for" mercy which seemed to mean that mercy was not something already present but something that was needed.
It was interesting to discover during this Inquiry that mercy did not feel like an essential quality, like Compassion, Truth, Love. Essential qualities have a non-dual state or experience even though the experience can be as a response to another. Essential qualities arise naturally within the field -- inner and outer. However, it seemed that mercy needs to be given and received -- a duality needs to exist in order for mercy to exist.
Later this evening I participated in my book/study group "Spacecruiser Inquiry." There are 17 people in the group; and we meet for 2 hours, every 3 weeks, over a conference call. One thing that came up tonight was the dedication and commitment each of us have to doing this work together. We're studying the book -- not just reading it; and we discuss how the material touched us. I'm always in awe at how energized and alive I feel when someone shares something honestly from a place of vulnerability. The whole field responds and holds the person sharing as it holds all of us. Group work is beautiful work.
Day 18, Netzach within Tiferet
Netzach (victory, conquering, eternity, security, dominance -- also, determination, perserverence)
Tiferet (beauty, mercy, compassion, the harmonization of Gevurah & Hesed)
This morning I did an Inquiry about "Mercy" with a friend from my Diamond Heart group. We started out inquiring about Mercy, remembering some phrases -- particularly the one: "Lord have Mercy." My grandmother used that one. She wasn't particularly religious; so, it seemed that the phrase was just something folks said in the south at certain times.
As the inquiry continued, the field informed us of a sense of helplessness . . . as if the one who's asking for mercy feels helpless. There was also a sense that some authority was the one who would grant the mercy -- like a sovereign or a judge or a god. Moving deeper into understanding mercy, it became obvious that one typically "asked for" mercy which seemed to mean that mercy was not something already present but something that was needed.
It was interesting to discover during this Inquiry that mercy did not feel like an essential quality, like Compassion, Truth, Love. Essential qualities have a non-dual state or experience even though the experience can be as a response to another. Essential qualities arise naturally within the field -- inner and outer. However, it seemed that mercy needs to be given and received -- a duality needs to exist in order for mercy to exist.
Later this evening I participated in my book/study group "Spacecruiser Inquiry." There are 17 people in the group; and we meet for 2 hours, every 3 weeks, over a conference call. One thing that came up tonight was the dedication and commitment each of us have to doing this work together. We're studying the book -- not just reading it; and we discuss how the material touched us. I'm always in awe at how energized and alive I feel when someone shares something honestly from a place of vulnerability. The whole field responds and holds the person sharing as it holds all of us. Group work is beautiful work.
Monday, June 06, 2011
WEEK 3 TIFERET
Day 17, Tiferet within Tiferet
Tiferet (beauty, mercy, compassion, the harmonization of Gevurah & Hesed)
"Compassion is a kind of healing agent which helps us to tolerate the hurt of seeing the truth." (quote from A. H. Almaas, Dimaond Heart Book 1, p. 92.
As I sit very still, quietly within this Gate 17, I notice it brings tears to my eyes. I feel so touched sitting here. It's like a gentle washing over and through me of the qualities associated with Tiferet. This experience is unexpected and yet most welcomed.
Words are so often empty vessels.
Sometimes, though, we can feel the very essence of what a word means.
No thought is necessary. No need to "already know" anything.
It seems we're somehow touched by the word from the inside-out.
But . . . it's not the word, it's the quality.
Words that are qualities. Qualities that are words.
I used to think I knew what "compassion" meant . . . and then I didn't. Everything I thought I knew was only what others had told me of what compassion meant or what I read about. It wasn't until fairly recently that I totally surrendered to the crazy possibility that it was true -- that I did NOT know what compassion really was. It sounded crazy, I know. But I knew that I had to give up what I thought I knew if I was ever to truly KNOW the essential quality of compassion.
Once I let go of all the knowing and let myself be ignorant, I actually was empty enough to receive -- to experience compassion directly -- with no preconceived ideas or beliefs. Compassion almost always makes me cry. Well, no. That's not quite the way it is. I typically respond to compassion with tears; and I think that's because I feel so touched.
Today, I realized I don't know what mercy is. I don't think I've ever experienced mercy. My head is full of ideas and beliefs about it, but I don't think I've ever experienced it directly. I wonder if it's similar to grace?
I'm ready to experience mercy directly now.
Day 17, Tiferet within Tiferet
Tiferet (beauty, mercy, compassion, the harmonization of Gevurah & Hesed)
"Compassion is a kind of healing agent which helps us to tolerate the hurt of seeing the truth." (quote from A. H. Almaas, Dimaond Heart Book 1, p. 92.
As I sit very still, quietly within this Gate 17, I notice it brings tears to my eyes. I feel so touched sitting here. It's like a gentle washing over and through me of the qualities associated with Tiferet. This experience is unexpected and yet most welcomed.
Words are so often empty vessels.
Sometimes, though, we can feel the very essence of what a word means.
No thought is necessary. No need to "already know" anything.
It seems we're somehow touched by the word from the inside-out.
But . . . it's not the word, it's the quality.
Words that are qualities. Qualities that are words.
I used to think I knew what "compassion" meant . . . and then I didn't. Everything I thought I knew was only what others had told me of what compassion meant or what I read about. It wasn't until fairly recently that I totally surrendered to the crazy possibility that it was true -- that I did NOT know what compassion really was. It sounded crazy, I know. But I knew that I had to give up what I thought I knew if I was ever to truly KNOW the essential quality of compassion.
Once I let go of all the knowing and let myself be ignorant, I actually was empty enough to receive -- to experience compassion directly -- with no preconceived ideas or beliefs. Compassion almost always makes me cry. Well, no. That's not quite the way it is. I typically respond to compassion with tears; and I think that's because I feel so touched.
Today, I realized I don't know what mercy is. I don't think I've ever experienced mercy. My head is full of ideas and beliefs about it, but I don't think I've ever experienced it directly. I wonder if it's similar to grace?
I'm ready to experience mercy directly now.
Sunday, June 05, 2011
WEEK 3 TIFERET
Day 16, Gevurah within Tiferet
Gevurah (strength, judgement, justice, boundaries, restraint)
Tiferet (beauty, mercy, compassion, the harmonization of Gevurah & Hesed)
It's interesting how the mind works. I looked at what this 16th Gate is called -- Gevurah within Tiferet -- and then immediately began to try to figure it out . . . a kind of worrying or picking at something. One might ask "what's wrong with that?" I think that's the way we're used to approaching life -- the way we face problems as well as moments of peace. The mind wants to figure out how we got here and how to map it so that we can save it for later when we want to return again.
I began to notice that my chest/heart felt a little constricted and heavy and my breathing was shallow. So, I stopped trying to figure all this gate stuff out and just focused on my breathing in my chest area. Within moments I felt a loosening and I actually did not care any more about figuring out this gate. ha! As soon as that happened -- a letting go, I guess -- an image of the Red Rock Country (Utah, Arizona, New Mexico) arose in my mind-screen. Such beauty! And the strength and form of those land structures -- the Arches, etc. are so awesome.
Day 16, Gevurah within Tiferet
Gevurah (strength, judgement, justice, boundaries, restraint)
Tiferet (beauty, mercy, compassion, the harmonization of Gevurah & Hesed)
It's interesting how the mind works. I looked at what this 16th Gate is called -- Gevurah within Tiferet -- and then immediately began to try to figure it out . . . a kind of worrying or picking at something. One might ask "what's wrong with that?" I think that's the way we're used to approaching life -- the way we face problems as well as moments of peace. The mind wants to figure out how we got here and how to map it so that we can save it for later when we want to return again.
I began to notice that my chest/heart felt a little constricted and heavy and my breathing was shallow. So, I stopped trying to figure all this gate stuff out and just focused on my breathing in my chest area. Within moments I felt a loosening and I actually did not care any more about figuring out this gate. ha! As soon as that happened -- a letting go, I guess -- an image of the Red Rock Country (Utah, Arizona, New Mexico) arose in my mind-screen. Such beauty! And the strength and form of those land structures -- the Arches, etc. are so awesome.
Saturday, June 04, 2011
WEEK 3 TIFERET
Day 15, Hesed within Tiferet
Hesed (lovingkindness, ever-flow, no boundaries, no restraint, unconditional giving)
Tiferet (beauty, mercy, compassion, the harmonization of Gevurah & Hesed)
Tiferet possesses the power to blend and harmonize the free outpouring love of hesed with the discipline of gevurah by introducing a third dimension - the dimension of truth.
Today is the beginning of a very special week of exploration for me personally because Tiferet has often revealed his aspects to me a through a number of levels -- the very depths of beauty and compassion. (Note: Tiferet is one of the sephirot which is considered a masculine sefirot.)
Day 15, Hesed within Tiferet
Hesed (lovingkindness, ever-flow, no boundaries, no restraint, unconditional giving)
Tiferet (beauty, mercy, compassion, the harmonization of Gevurah & Hesed)
Tiferet possesses the power to blend and harmonize the free outpouring love of hesed with the discipline of gevurah by introducing a third dimension - the dimension of truth.
Today is the beginning of a very special week of exploration for me personally because Tiferet has often revealed his aspects to me a through a number of levels -- the very depths of beauty and compassion. (Note: Tiferet is one of the sephirot which is considered a masculine sefirot.)
Friday, June 03, 2011
WEEK 2 GEVURAH
Day 14, Malkhut within Gevurah
Malkhut (kingdom, the reflection of everything) Malkhut represents the power that ultimately unifies all the diverse powers of the Sefirot and holds everything together. Without Malkhut, creation would remain incomplete.
Gevurah (strength, judgement, justice, boundaries, restraint)
In this moment I'm remembering that while studying Kabbalah over the years, there's an understanding about malkhut and keter being wedged together -- keter being the beginning; malkhut being the end. And, as I recall this fact, I remember that the image of the ouroboros arose in my consciousness back then. And, in this very moment, this image arises again. Are you familiar with the ouroboros, the snake eating its tail?
The Zohar compares malkhut to the moon; it has no light of its own. However, on the other hand, malkhut is the final revelation of the Divine Light for the entire process of manifestation -- in the beginning and continuously each and every moment of Life.
I'm wondering about this (Malkhut) being the 7th day of creation -- Shabbat -- cessation of work so that Creation can be revealed? That was never something mentioned in my Catholic upbringing (not that I remember at any rate). Does this "cessation of work" merely mean to be still, stop efforting, just be . . . be the unfolding.
And, how does all this that I've been writing about fit inside the consciousness of Gevurah. Let's see how this day unfolds.
Day 14, Malkhut within Gevurah
Malkhut (kingdom, the reflection of everything) Malkhut represents the power that ultimately unifies all the diverse powers of the Sefirot and holds everything together. Without Malkhut, creation would remain incomplete.
Gevurah (strength, judgement, justice, boundaries, restraint)
The Zohar compares malkhut to the moon; it has no light of its own. However, on the other hand, malkhut is the final revelation of the Divine Light for the entire process of manifestation -- in the beginning and continuously each and every moment of Life.
I'm wondering about this (Malkhut) being the 7th day of creation -- Shabbat -- cessation of work so that Creation can be revealed? That was never something mentioned in my Catholic upbringing (not that I remember at any rate). Does this "cessation of work" merely mean to be still, stop efforting, just be . . . be the unfolding.
And, how does all this that I've been writing about fit inside the consciousness of Gevurah. Let's see how this day unfolds.
Thursday, June 02, 2011
WEEK 2 GEVURAH
Day 13, Yesod within Gevurah
Yesod (foundation, connection)
Gevurah (strength, judgement, justice, boundaries, restraint)
I read somewhere that Yesod is "the 'small' and 'narrow' bridge between the infinite potential of procreation that flows into it and its actual manifestation in the world. We procreate on the spiritual plane as well as the physical.
My day was "bookended" with people I know from a business network and Free U. It's actually rather nice to feel comfortable being with these groups. Even though I've never "liked" networking, it seems that with this group of people it's just connecting -- real to real. Nothing put on -- no fluff. Just real people meeting together for a common purpose.
This evening's purpose was to envision how Robyn's shop would look in a new place. I didn't think I'd like the space but as I listened to the others' ideas, I began to change my mind. Robyn gathered together friends and business associates to help her envision possibilities. She's located a new physical place (new foundation on one level) and yet it's close enough to her old shop to maintain her connection with her current customers.
This was an interesting perspective of this 13th gate of consciousness.
Day 13, Yesod within Gevurah
Yesod (foundation, connection)
Gevurah (strength, judgement, justice, boundaries, restraint)
I read somewhere that Yesod is "the 'small' and 'narrow' bridge between the infinite potential of procreation that flows into it and its actual manifestation in the world. We procreate on the spiritual plane as well as the physical.
My day was "bookended" with people I know from a business network and Free U. It's actually rather nice to feel comfortable being with these groups. Even though I've never "liked" networking, it seems that with this group of people it's just connecting -- real to real. Nothing put on -- no fluff. Just real people meeting together for a common purpose.
This evening's purpose was to envision how Robyn's shop would look in a new place. I didn't think I'd like the space but as I listened to the others' ideas, I began to change my mind. Robyn gathered together friends and business associates to help her envision possibilities. She's located a new physical place (new foundation on one level) and yet it's close enough to her old shop to maintain her connection with her current customers.
This was an interesting perspective of this 13th gate of consciousness.
Wednesday, June 01, 2011
WEEK 2 GEVURAH
Day 12, Hod within Gevurah
Hod (splendor, empathy, thankfulness, gratefulness, submission, surrender, joy)
Gevurah (strength, judgement, justice, boundaries, restraint)
I'm very interested to see how my day unfolds within this gate of consciousness. So far, my morning has consisted of working together with a colleague inquiring into a space where I felt both touched and wary (actually, it was fear). Seeing the paradox of truly experiencing both of these states together was interesting and also allowed a deepening of understanding myself. Once I surrendered to the process to let it unfold and be whatever it is, to allow myself to experience Reality exactly as it is, I began to understand the fear. It's quite a different experience to see oneself as an object of splendor and being (all encompassing) splendor itself. It's frightening to think of losing myself, or the object that's who I think I am -- even if the loss brings me to experiencing myself as True Nature -- as a multitude of essential qualities. It's all quite mysterious and scary. And, that's exactly what I'm here to do.
Note: The spiritual state identified in Chassidut as corresponding to hod is sincerity.
Day 12, Hod within Gevurah
Hod (splendor, empathy, thankfulness, gratefulness, submission, surrender, joy)
Gevurah (strength, judgement, justice, boundaries, restraint)
I'm very interested to see how my day unfolds within this gate of consciousness. So far, my morning has consisted of working together with a colleague inquiring into a space where I felt both touched and wary (actually, it was fear). Seeing the paradox of truly experiencing both of these states together was interesting and also allowed a deepening of understanding myself. Once I surrendered to the process to let it unfold and be whatever it is, to allow myself to experience Reality exactly as it is, I began to understand the fear. It's quite a different experience to see oneself as an object of splendor and being (all encompassing) splendor itself. It's frightening to think of losing myself, or the object that's who I think I am -- even if the loss brings me to experiencing myself as True Nature -- as a multitude of essential qualities. It's all quite mysterious and scary. And, that's exactly what I'm here to do.
Note: The spiritual state identified in Chassidut as corresponding to hod is sincerity.
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